On Depression
Thats what isolation does to humans i think. It breaks them slowly and painfully. It starts deeper inside rather than on the surface level and later on it squeezes all the life out of the person going through depression. One might say “ oh they didn’t have so much problem in their life that they had to commit suicide.” or that they had everything career, love, money everything! then why choose to die? Thats where individual differences come into play. Your mind and its capacity to process and manage a moderately stressing stimulus might be good but it is not necessary that the other person might have the same mental capacity to do so. Maybe their mind has a tendency to hold on to that stressor longer that they should. But it is not their fault, neither it is in their control. Therefore, even after achieving everything in life, one stressor is enough to act as a trigger for them to fall into a spiral of mental health issues.
Most of the people whom i talk to often label victims of suicide or survivors of it as weak. No! they are not…in no way are they weak or losers. They have been strong for way too long that now life has turned unbearable for them. They look for an escape for peace which they are not able to find. Their mind goes on and on and on and starts acting more like an enemy than a part of themselves and that leads them slowly towards the end of their life.
Many say you should go and get therapy or watch happy stuff if you are depressed, as if that would help them get rid of their depression. Theres a difference between feeling sad, depressed and being in depression. They are not the same. Clinical depression is way more serious than feeling depressed or sad. Everyone feels sad or depressed but that doesn’t mean they necessarily have depression. According to DSM-5:
Depression, otherwise known as major depressive disorder or clinical depression, is a common and serious mood disorder. Those who suffer from depression experience persistent feelings of sadness and hopelessness and loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed. Aside from the emotional problems caused by depression, individuals can also present with a physical symptom such as chronic pain or digestive issues. To be diagnosed with depression, symptoms must be present for at least two weeks.
The DSM-5 outlines the following criterion to make a diagnosis of depression. The individual must be experiencing five or more symptoms during the same 2-week period and at least one of the symptoms should be either (1) depressed mood or (2) loss of interest or pleasure.
Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day.
Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day.
Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain, or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day.
A slowing down of thought and a reduction of physical movement (observable by others, not merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down).
Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.
Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt nearly every day.
Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day.
Recurrent thoughts of death, recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide.
*** PLEASE DO NOT SELF DIAGNOSE YOURSELF, IF YOU FEEL YOU MEET THE CRITERIA OF THIS DISORDER PLEASE CONSULT A PSYCHOLOGIST OR A PSYCHIATRIST***
Depression is a serious mood disorder and people should seek help. However, seeking help is not the first step. The first step towards treating any disorder is acceptance. Accepting that- yes a problem does exists seems easy but it is not for a lot of people. This can be due to their notion about themselves that they are “strong” and can handle their own issues. Often neglecting the acceptance stage, people burry their own problems deep within that later on builds up and explodes with much greater force. Always remember no one can help you until and unless you accept that a problem exists and you want to help yourself. Our loved ones, friends often try to help people with psychological issues however, most fail to help as people do not accept the underlying problem.
Another major problem with depression going undetected by people suffering from it is that it has variations. Depression isn’t the same for very one, there are different types of depression thats why DSM-5 refers to them as major depressive disorders rather than just depression. Most people do not come under general public attention/criteria of depression as they are often high functioning. High functioning depression is completely opposite of what people in general think depression looks like. It is invisible to an untrained eye. People who suffer from high functioning depression often seem to be working just fine and in fact better than others in some cases. They are hard working and often workaholics as well, they may function well in relationships, talk normally with all the new world emoticons in place etc, however, inside they are constantly battling with negative thoughts, guilt etc, just like others with depression symptoms. Hence, you cannot tell by looking if someone is just fine or suffering from depression by how they function in their day to day life.
So what should we do? How and whom do we help? How would we know who is in depression and whom do we treat well?
Basic and logical answer to this is to be empathetic towards everyone and not just towards people you think need help. Listen to what the individual is saying and be present. Thats it! You don’t have to go into philosophical lectures to make people believe in life. You don’t need to tell them that they are wasting their life. And especially do not tell them to smile and get over it!
The only way you can help anyone is by being empathetic and being a good listener, don’t find larger than life solutions and don’t give them suggestions to follow that might have worked for you when you were sad. Be there for them, reach out to them, talk and help them by making them believe in you.
